You say Noodle, I say Spaetzle

gdcom_1868_107569050


I grew up in Bavaria, and as a result, I love spaetzle. I especially love it with a nice jägerschnitzel – mushroom gravy – mmmm!

Because my baby loves me, she got me a bunch of German pre-fab side dishes, like potato pancakes, potato dumplings, and spaetzle (pictured).

I was all set to get my international grub on last night, as I decided to have the spaetzle with some kielbasa that a friend of mine gave me.

The pre-fab spaetzle aren’t your typical sort of dried pasta. Spaetzle tend to be a little thick through the middle, so these pre-fabs are super dried. I don’t really know any other way to put it. If you put a dried elbow macaroni noodle in your mouth, you can bite through it and eat it in a sense. Nothing doing with these buggers. In fact, you could break a tooth, so don’t try it.

The instructions said to boil water (natch) and then cook the noodles for 20-25 minutes (woah). Twenty minutes? For noodles? Inconceivable! But whatever, I was willing to sacrifice the time for a little bit of home, even though it would cut into the beginning of Smallville (yay DVR!).

20 to 25 minutes later, they were soft, but also a sort of grainy that I found most distasteful, not to mention a waterlogged sort of flavorlessness. But maybe I was expecting too much, they’re really just the lazy man’s egg noodle. What I did know was that the taste and texture was nothing like what a homemade spaetzle should be.

I’m getting to the point of all this. If you really want spaetzle, don’t ever buy the pre-fab. Waiting for 4 quarts of water to boil plus 20-25 minutes of cooking for noodles that take 10 minutes to make is what I like to call “crazy talk.”

I commend Maggi on the effort to make pre-fab spaetzle available, but what is the point if it takes longer than making it from scratch and the end result is substandard?

It’s helpful if you have one of these, but if you don’t, you can substitute a ricer, or a collander, or a perforated pizza pan, or a mesh strainer with big enough gaps or anything with holes in it, really.

I happen to have one of those spaetzle makers, so I took my slotted spoon and fished those “spaetzle” out of my boiling water, tossed them down the disposal, and made me a quick batch of the real thing. They’re done as soon as they float, which takes all of 10 seconds.

Here’s the recipe:


2 large eggs beaten
1/3 cup milk or water
1/2 teaspoon table salt
1/4 teaspoon ground white pepper finely
1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1 1/2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour
4 tablespoons unsalted butter at room temperature, cut into 6 pieces

1. Beat eggs, milk, and seasonings in a medium bowl. Stir in flour to form a smooth but thick batter; let batter rest for a few minutes.

2. Meanwhile place 1 tablespoon butter into a bowl that has been rinsed in hot water and dried. Heat water to boil.

3. Salt boiling water, then spoon a portion of the batter into the the square container that runs along the grater track. With the machine resting on the pan rim, move the metal container quickly back and forth along the grater until about 1/6 of the dough is pressed through the grater into the boiling water.

4. With a slotted spoon transfer spaetzle that have floated to the water’s surface to the warm bowl. Repeat cooking in batches with remaining batter, adding butter to each batch of cooked spaeztle. Toss and serve.

Personally, I never add the nutmug, just my preference. From start to finish, this method will take 1/2 the time and 3/4 less money than Maggi’s version of my favorite noodle.

The 2nd best use of spaetzle is Käse Spaetzle. Take your cooked noodles and layer it with swiss cheese, bake until melty, and top with onions (fried or sauteed).

The 3rd best use of spaetlze is what I did to them last night. Saute some onions and mushrooms in a saucepan with butter, and/or whatever floats your boat, toss in the noodles to get a smidge of crisp to them, and yum. I served some up with my broiled/baked kielbasa, rewound the beginning of Smallville and got my grub on.

Here’s to making myself hungry.


1105 days ago lex